Yesterday was a rough day for me… I woke up in the morning, and against my very best judgment, I headed straight for my computer… just to check on “one thing.”
Next thing I know it’s practically two hours later, and I hadn’t eaten, meditated or drank my tea, and I was sitting on my coach absorbed into my screen like a zombie.
I was also starving and felt totally un-rooted… like I had jumped into a frantic sea of taking care of everyone else’s little details and requests before I had even washed my own face.
It felt TERRIBLE. And it set the tone for the day.
Why is it so hard for us to learn that we need to nourish ourselves first… before we start doing things for other people?
I had an epiphany about this during a meditation.
There’s a part of me that mindlessly and anxiously busies herself, taking care of all these myriad little things because she needs people to see how productive she is, that she’s taking care of business, taking care of them… so they will see and love and appreciate her. Sigh.
Today, I’m taking the bold step of trusting that people will see and love and appreciate me even if I don’t answer their emails from yesterday by 8:15AM!!
So there’s my self-care lesson for the week!
That 90 minutes after I wake up?
That is my time: My time to take care of myself, nourish myself, feed myself, fill myself up. My time to root down into myself before I branch out to help others.
And then, I’ll flip on the screen and help you :)
What Belief is Stopping You From Taking Care of Yourself?
I can (and will) give you a whole bunch of good self-care tips that I’ve learned and integrated over the years.
But it’s all a moot point if you don’t first identify the belief that is stopping you from truly giving yourself permission to take care of yourself.
In addition to mine above, here are a few other common beliefs:
- I don’t deserve it (to rest, to get this massage, to take time off)
- I don’t have enough time for it
- I don’t have enough money for it
- I need to take care of other people first, because they need me
- People will be disappointed in me if I don’t…
- I’m selfish if I care for myself
- I’ll do it after I do x, y, and z
- I’ll lose out on business if I stop working
Storyteller Michael Meade says the only thing we can replace an old story with is a new story.
So what’s the flipside of your story? How will you re-tell your story?
Here are some ideas to get you started:
I am a human being of the earth, and I like every other living being, need rest and nourishment.
I can and do create time for rest and nourishment.
I am happy to spend money on my health and wellbeing, (and plus it doesn’t need to cost a lot anyways).
I will be better able to support my family and friends if I feel good.
I am only selfish if I do not take care of myself, as this will ultimately have a negative impact on both me and the people around me.
People who truly love me, love me because of who I am, not simply for the things I do for them.
I can stop anytime I want and take a break. The world will not end.
I trust that if I take care of myself, I will have more energy for my business, and that my business will actually go BETTER if I fill myself up instead of burn myself out.
What’s your new story?
In my next post, I’ll talk about the Five Ways of Nourishment so you can actually implement some changes (instead of just believing it to be true, which is a great start).
And hint… it’s more than just massages!